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Sunday, September 22, 2013

Against the Dark (Steven Seagal) a DVD Movie Review.

Against the Dark Poster
Against the Dark (aka Last Night) badly combines two separate genres. Watching Against the Dark is like watching someone go through an Identity crisis. On one hand, it tries being a slick vampire hunter movie. On the other hand, it tries being a gritty zombie horror. The shaky-cam-hand-held style of this movie does nothing. One would assume they did this to give Against the Dark a realistic atmosphere. The way the actors behave and communicate on-screen tosses any sense of reality out the window. I don’t think the actors are at fault; that is the way the script was written. There is no introduction or any character development is in sight. We begin the movie tossed into the middle of the action, yet there isn't any real action. The movie uses extremely dark cinematography, and all the kill shots are off-screen.

**Spoiler Alert!!! If I can actually "spoil" this movie**

To make things worse, two separate movies are going on here. The entire army sub-plot with Keith David wanting to blow up and quarantine the area surrounding hospital site could have been left out. This sub-plot has nothing to do with the rest of the movie. It’s supposed to add tension but just seems tacked on. The hospital is extremely dirty and falling apart. Are we to believe this is a couple of months after the outbreak? Aren't hospitals the most immaculate places? Who would choose to hide out in a hospital in the middle of an outbreak, anyways, wouldn't that be the most infected place in town? All the sick people would concentrate here. The opening narration warns us of the super contagious virus, which spreads via blood and saliva. Yet the Hunters choose to fight with swords and no protective gear? This is completely ridiculous but what else does one expect? Why do the civilians have no weapons! Wouldn't you try to defend yourself with whatever is available?

The characters make one stupid decision after another, the hospital is on reserve power but let’s take the elevator? Someone even suggest that it might stop working! Moreover, the characters never decide what the creatures are: vampires, zombies or mutants? The opening narration would suggest vampires, and the creatures do have fangs. They tear out people’s guts, tear away limbs, and devour flesh like zombies. One character says “they’re not vampires”. Of course, the zombies don’t even act consistent! The zombie masses are brainless eating machines, and the ones that talk seem more like creepy perverts! The makeup and blood effects are extremely bad. It’s like Halloween at the mall!

Steven Seagal Against the Dark
To seal the deal, Steven Seagal is supposedly the star of this movie but he’s barely seen on-screen. You don’t even figure out who Seagal is until 45 minutes into the film! "I'm Tao" (ominous theme music) Seagal is a badass swordsman slicing and dicing his way through the zombies. Sadly, when the action picks up Seagal ditches the sword for a sawed-off shotgun! Steven Seagal has a couple good one-liners, but they can’t save this muddled mess of a film. The best part of the movie is Steven Seagal’s opening line “We're not here to decide who's right or wrong, we're just here to decide who lives and dies”. Apparently, Steven Seagal did this movie for free and someone else dubbed over his lines! I recommend you don’t buy this DVD but rent it from the Red Box… the laughs and WTF moments are almost worth $1.50

Rating:   Yawn, I Fell Asleep (I truly wish I had)

Buy Now on DVD! if you must.

check out the trailer below...

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